"The facade appears full of strength and resilience. But how much softness and lack of willpower there is within!" (St. Josemaria Escrivá)
Weakness! Do you sometimes feel as if you are collapsing into a black hole of hypocrisy? You are not alone. No matter how we may try and try to do what is right, human nature takes over and reminds us that we are sinful creatures in our thoughts and actions. Other people may think we are holy and good, but we know better! There is only one remedy for this state: prayer, prayer and more prayer. The Irish Jesuits help shed some light on this:
"At times we can feel lost and think that nobody cares if we are alive or dead. Prayer becomes difficult, and we are thrown back on our own weakness. St. Paul takes up the theme, 'The Spirit comes to help us in our weakness. For when we cannot chose words in order to pray properly, the Spirit himself expresses our plea in a way that could never be put into words, and God who knows everything in our hearts knows perfectly well what he means.' (Romans 8:26) In old age and in sickness, prayer does not become easier, and St. Paul's words matter more and more. We have a place in God's mind. God knows everything in our hearts. There is a constant bond of love and communication between the Holy Spirit in us and God in heaven." (Sacred Space)
Trials of any kind can make us weak, but God knows our hearts even when we don't trust them ourselves. Like an injured child in his mother's arms, we can simply rest, simply be. The Holy Spirit carries us when He utters what we can't begin to express. Then the weakness in our hearts touches the sacred in God's, and is transformed.
Today, trust that even when you feel powerless, God's grace is sufficient for you. (2 Corinth. 12:9) Pray for His strength when you can't count on your own.
St. Josemaria Escrivá, pray for us!